My TV quit turning on the other day. Quite annoying, actually, because I have the urge to watch movies lately, which doesn't happen that often, and now I'm stuck watching them on my old computer. It's okay though. I'm not missing much on TV. So I was thinking, gosh, with no TV to suck me in and distract me, what a wonderful time to work on the novel I started last November! I really do want to finish it, but for some reason, motivation has been severely lacking lately. Somehow yesterday I managed to avoid it all day. I finished my book, messed around with the TV, wrote an email to Samsung (they are NOT helpful), went to see The Karate Kid (definitely worth seeing!), and then wasted many hours reading through my old entries and on http://www.hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/. If you like my sense of humor and don't have too much of an aversion to some swearing, go read it. It's hilarious. I sit and giggle to myself when I read it, which probably makes me look crazy, but nobody can see me (I think), so I'm not too worried. ANYWAY, so about 1:00am I'm like, oh crap, I didn't even look at my novel. Oh well, bedtime!
Today I was SURE I was gonna do it. Positive. I need to sit down and read the dang thing again first, and then I'll be golden. Not hard, right? Wrong. This is sort of what my day has looked like thus far:
- Get up. Wander around a bit. Decide it is too early to be up. Go back to bed.
- Wake up again, wondering about dreams that include the author of hyperboleandahalf.com (weird, maybe need to slow down with the reading) and people I knew in middle school. Think maybe I should friend them all on facebook and reconnect.
- Upon further consideration, decide not to friend people on facebook I haven't talked to in over 10 years because they might find it creepy to find a message from me saying "I had a dream about you last night..."
- Decide it's high time I curl my hair, which I haven't done in two years. Spend extra time making ringlets. Sing into the end of the curling iron when appropriate.
- Go to check my email. And Facebook. And http://www.cakewrecks.com/. And http://www.postsecret.com/. See if anyone has commented on my blog today (they haven't). Go back to Facebook and look through albums my friends have been tagged in.
- Decide to make mac n cheese for lunch. Fill pot with water and set on stove.
- Remember it's Father's Day and I should call my dad. Talk to him for a long time while playing Solitaire.
- Remember that I was making mac n cheese and wonder why the water isn't boiling. Turn on stove.
- Get out box of mac n cheese.
- Try to plug TV in and push button until water boils.
- Look for box of mac n cheese. Find it on the couch.
- Ponder ways to use my non-working TV. Come up with following ideas:
~ Giant paperweight
~ First exhibit in my new sculpture garden dedicated to broken technology
~ Open it up and play with the parts inside (after unplugging)
~ Invite people over for a movie and stare at the TV, laughing every once in a while as if there is actually a movie playing
~ Bedazzle it
~ Draw a face on it and have a conversation
~ That's all I got for now
- Fix mac n cheese. Enjoy.
- Decide to take a walk even though it might rain. Consider all the ways to blog about walking in the rain
- Stop to examine nature on the walk. Go around the park an extra time to burn off the extra mac n cheese calories. (Giggle about the fact that sometimes I type "man and cheese")
- Come home and collapse
- Get a drink of water. Get another drink of water. Notice an old napkin on the refrigerator where my dear friend Masako (she is Japanese, super cute!) wrote all the requirements for my husband on 11/2/06. Signed and dated. They are as follows (quoted directly from napkin, numbers are list of most important attributes, others are negotiable):
Renata Husband Must:
~ Be Brit or Aussie, or accent with Italian, Irish, or Scottish
~ (1) Christian - non denominational
~ (4)Musical - sing, guitar, and/or piano, no dancing necessary (but certainly welcomed!)
~ Taller than 6 feet
~ Teddybear huggable *picture of bear* No skinny boys need to apply. No bodybuilder please.
~ (5) Love kids
~ Not a pastor nor a hitman
~ No older than 2-3 years older. No younger than a year.
~ Small town boy living in a city, not in Sioux Falls forever
~ (assumed) Good kisser and hugger and cuddler
~ (assumed) In LOVE with Renata
~ (2) Outgoing, sense of humour, bizarre one like Renata's
~ Likes Jill and friends
~ (3) Respects family of his and Renata's
~ Respect Renata's personal time and space
~11/2/06, (signed) Masako Izumi
- Giggle about the list and think about possible exceptions. Try to remember who came up with most of them, me or Masako.
- Check facebook again. Write on walls. Check other websites.
- Decide it's high time for another blog.
- Write incredibly long post. Wonder how to make it longer without people quitting halfway through. Figure they probably already quit. Cry.
Phew. And that brings us to now. I suppose unless I put a DVD in my computer, I haven't much else to keep me occupied, so I should go work on the novel. I really do want to finish this book. But...my room does need to be cleaned...
Update: Since finishing this blog, I went and returned my redbox DVD (Nine, don't see it, I didn't even finish it), had dinner, and now I'm watching Golden Girls on my computer, playing Solitaire, and chatting with Phyllis. Clearly I don't have nearly enough time to work on my novel. AND I have four blisters on my right foot from my walk, including one that is bulging out of the top of my little toe and may possibly be a miniature pod person who is going to pop out and eat my brain. Or clean my house.
Update #2: I was talking with Phyllis and said this: "I just had a panic attack cuz my phone vibrated but i couldn't find it and i threw my blanket and shook it out and looked in the couch cushions and it was on the kitchen counter." Phyllis told me that she giggled more picturing me doing that than finding my box of mac n cheese on the couch. This led me to wonder if I'm funnier when I don't mean to be, or if Phyllis is just twisted and easily entertained. Probably a little of both.
Update #3: Apparently I update a lot when I don't have TV. I really need a life.