Friday, November 20, 2009

Confessions

I have a confession to make. I am twenty five years old...and I went to a midnight showing of New Moon last night! It's true! I am a Twilight junkie, and I needed my next hit. And let me tell you...it knocked my socks off. A quick review of the movie...it was great. Much more well done than the first one, and it followed the book more closely, though nothing could live up to the wondefulosity of the book. Taylor Lautner was great and really carried the movie. Rob Pattinson was kinda...umm...high looking. But still good. And I actually liked Kristen Stewart, which I definitely did not for the first movie. Wonderful. Movie = Good. Now. On to the good stuff.

Kari and I arrive at the theater around 10:30 or so. First of all, I must say that it was unbelievably clever of them to have a blood drive before this movie. Seriously. Who thinks up these things? I'd like to shake their hand. We get inside and immediately are accosted by teenage girls with raffle tickets. "Pick a team, win a prize!" they say. I picked. I didn't win. In the center of the lobby people are getting their picture taken with cardboard cutouts of the cast. Don't tell Kari, but I was seriously tempted to drag her over there and force her to take a picture with me. However, she groaned enough with the pictures I took with my own camera. She doesn't want proof. I attempte to take a picture of a couple dressed up as Edward and Bella, but trying to be sneaky by not using flash results in a blurry picture. Also in the center of the lobby are tables set up with other raffles and free stuff. And formal wear. Yeah, I don't get it either. There isn't even a prom scene in this one. That was soooo last movie. But there it was. We take a couple pictures then stand awkwardly. We are among the minority...we are not wearing Twilight t-shirts. A lady rushes up to us. "Do you have your koozies yet?" We shake our heads, maybe a bit confused. She shoves them in our hands and skips away. I am now the proud owner of a bright green Aveda koozie. Awesome. I guess they drink soda in New Moon.

After making the circuit, we decide to see if we can get our seats. I mean, come on, the movie starts in just over an hour! Though the marquee says that New Moon is now seating, we are stopped at the ticket taker place and told to wait. We are first in line. For our theater anyway. Apparently another one is already full. However, I choose to pretend that we're first in line, because I'm just that lame. Finally, they let us in. I'm surprised we aren't stampeded over. Teenage girls are vicious. We snag some seats in the second row in the back part of the theater. Perfect level for viewing. The theater fills behind us. Surprisingly, there are very few members of the male species in attendance. Go figure. There are a few, though they are not giggling and giddy like most of the girls. There is a wide variety of different shirts. People watching is fun. After a little while, a manager comes in and gives five minute speech, thanking people for helping to put things together. He thanks us, the movie-goers, as well. Kari is glowing by the end. She feels wonderful about herself. We didn't know we were going to get a boost in self-esteem at this movie! A little while later, one of the teenage girls decides to do a poll...Team Edward or Team Jacob. Edward wins. Of course. Then more employees come in with a trivia game. I know all the answers, but I don't win anything because I am a pansy. I raise my hand, feel lame, put it down, think "I know this," put my hand back up, feel lame, put it down. They ignore me. There is an annoying woman down in front who cries, "I'm Alice, by the way!" and is really quite annoying. After the game is finished, a last minute trip to the bathroom is in order. I search for the facilities, finally asking an employeed where the nearest restroom is. She points right behind her, where a lit-up sign declaring "Women" is quite obvious. It's late.

At 12:01 the previews start. At 12:05 they stall and then restart. They're teasing us. At 12:15, the fans begin to get restless, calling out for the movie to begin. At 12:25, the movie finally begins, and the theater erupts in cheers. The ladies next to me are particularly creepy. One of them, before any actors even arrive on screen, begins moaning. "Mmmm...mmmmmm...." I am very uncomfortable. Let me just say, there were many women who didn't get any of the plot line, distracted as they were by Taylor Lautner's abs. I look over at Kari frequently. She smiles the entire time. I'm glad I don't have mind-reading skills, because I'm sure most of her thoughts are impure. She wants to be a cougar. She is focused on the fact that Taylor is legal in just a few months. There are some cheesy scenes involving Jacob slowly removing his shirt, and then Edward and Bella running through the forest in slow motion dressed in old fashioned clothes. Sparkling. Lol. I love cheese.

The movie finishes. I am happy. I drive home in a sleepy state, fall into bed, and dream of...not New Moon. I know what Kari dreamt about...but I can't talk about it on here...I like to keep things PG...




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